September 10th

Hank

In early November, Husband and I moved into our new house.

It has been busy, busy, busy since then. We have fixed a gas pipe and regular water pipes, cleaned hinges and found cabinets not being held up by hinges at all. We have primed and painted the pantry, the kitchen cabinets, the hallway, bathroom cabinets, and our massive hall cabinets and drawers. We have applied contact paper and fixed toilets and kitchen faucets. Husband and his friend used a metal lath to make a male-male faucet screw so that we could use the faucet neck that I picked out without realizing that there was a difference in how they were made. We have mowed the lawn, whacked the weeds, laid the insulation (okay, Husband did most of that). We have created a cleaning cabinet, created a dryer vent, replaced the shower heads and unplugged about six million drains.

It has been alot of work. And then we had cats. Cats who needed shots, who needed to be fixed, who needed some dental care and regular baths. Cats who shed their fur in clumps all over the house, all over the couch, all over the kitchen, all over my bed. Cats who jumped at the first light in the window in the morning and landed on my head. Cats who turned over for a belly rub as soon as I woke up and then scratched at my heel if I passed them by. Cats who laid in my laundry basket and my clean laundry, in my drawers and in my closet.

It was an incredible amount of work. And then, last week, we added a puppy.

The Cat's Meow

The new house has been filled with all sorts of surprises. Some have been good, like discovering that the owners left us a tool box filled with excellent quality tools, or finding a nice cast iron frying pan in a (bathroom) cabinet. Some of the other surprises have been of the middle of the road "eh" variety, such as finding that some of the handles on cabinets were painted and not screwed in, or realizing that the spare bathroom toilet would stop spouting smelly gunk as soon as the wax ring was replaced. And still other surprises have been, well, not-so-good. Among these was a gas leak that took Husband and my father three days of trenching and pipe relaying to fix, a window screen that NO MATTER WHAT will never stay in because it has nothing to latch it on except balance, and a KitchenAid dishwasher that stank to high heavens for at least two weeks while we tried everything to stop it. It would not drain. It could not drain. It was a friggin' nightmare.

But the biggest surprise of all came just the other day. I couldn't find the kitten Anastacia and I decided that before I went looking all over the yard for her, I'd use the bathroom. So I walked into the bathroom, lifted the toilet seat and found...

AN UNHAPPY KITTEN IN MY TOILET.

Sitting there. Drenched. Sullenly saying "meow" and too traumatized to move. The picture will follow as soon as I figure out how to get my pictures off my camera and onto the computer with the new setup.

Little By Little

Thankfully, life is still slowing down around here. This weekend wasn't busy at all and it left Husband and I with time to spend on ourselves, something which has been in short supply around these parts lately. On Saturday, Husband went to a football game with my father and my cousins. They seemed to enjoy it, in part because their team won which was in stark contrast to the baseball game Husband went to with my dad last weekend. Apparently, the football game made up for everything that went awry during that pitiful baseball game. While Husband was at the game, my mother and Sister and I went out to the Huntington Gardens and the Norton Simon Museum. The gardens are possibly the most beautiful gardens in the world and I love them every time we go. When my sisters and I were kids, my parents took us to the Huntington and took pictures of us running around in the vast expanses of grass, goofing off near the fountain, and standing next to statues. I look forward to repeating those times with my own children. Anyway, Mom wanted to explore a plant sale so Sister and I toured the gardens without her. We only went to the Rose Garden, the Children's Garden, and the Japanese Garden but I got plenty of good photographs and neither of us had seen the Children's Garden before, so a good time was had by all. Then we helped Mom carry a couple potted plants back to the car =) The museum was alot of fun as well.

On Sunday morning, Husband and I drove back to my parents' house for breakfast. After breakfast, we reviewed escrow instructions together and saw Sister off to her mid-day coffee date with her boyfriend. And then? That was it. We walked to the house we're buying, looked around and got excited, and then we drove home. We spent the afternoon cleaning - washing dishes, shredding papers, the like - and then we went to the park and walked around. It was a nice date, something we've not done in awhile, and it was great to just walk and talk and flirt.

Despite things slowing down in our lives, alot is changing as well. We are trying to pack things up to move and keep the area reasonably clean at the same time. I think that everyone who has ever moved can agree with us that this? Is an impossible feat. Part of the problem is, well, me. I am one of those people who is constantly in the middle of fifteen books and who always has at least a dozen small projects going on at once. And G-d save the soul who tampers with the location of a book or a project. It has been exceedingly difficult for me to pack these things up and maintain my sense of sanity at the same time. I know they will be unpacked shortly but suddenly it will occure to me at 10pm that I just don't remember the name of a character in some obscure book and it takes alot of willpower to not tear open boxes looking for that one book. It helps that I know that once I did find the book, I would forget what I was looking for in the first place. Anyway, suffice to say that I have been a hinderance =P

A month? Already?

It has been over a month since I've had the time or energy to post here or comment elsewhere and quite a bit has happened over the past few weeks. For one, Husband and I re-entered escrow with the house across the street from the house that fell through. We also adopted a kitten I named Anastacia. As of right now, a relative is housing the kitten until we have moved into the house, so we don't know how Anastacia will get along with our current cuddle-monkey cat, Sebastian. There have also been two significant deaths in my family - one relative each from my mother and my father's families. In fact, while my mother flew to Chicago for one funeral, my father and I flew to Seattle for the other. They were held on the same day.

Outside of this, that which has occurred has kept Husband and I busy, but is not really worth writing about. I spent a few days watching Husband's nieces and we went to the LA County Fair with his sister and her family. We also witnessed Husband's brother's graduation; he is now a police officer and thus fully capable of wrangling free goods out of any doughtnut shop along his beat. I actually do not know if he has a beat or what a beat really is, but it sounded good. Husband and I also helped his aunt move into a place which is decidedly closer to where we live (and will soon live) than her old home was. She will also save a fortune on transportation to and from work because now she lives so far away from work that she has to take the train and her company? Pays for the train tickets. So her commute is less because there is no traffic and her transportation is virtually free. How cool is that? There was the day of Husband's nephew turning four years old as well, and several days that we spent over at my parents' home when he worked outside with my dad and I chatted with my mom. And that? I think that about sums it up. Also, my parents celebrated their anniversary recently, we visited with Husband's cousin who visited from out of town, and we discovered that a close relative of Husband was diagnosed with diabetes which can, luckily, be controlled by diet.

In the month prior to that, my mother and I traveled to Illinois to celebrate the 100th birthday of my great-grandmother's sister. She passed away shortly thereafter, and so I think my mother and I were both pleased to have had the opportunity to visit with her one last time while she was alive. While in Illinois, we also devoted a day to walking around the Chicago Botanical Gardens, which were breathtaking. I cannot find the postcards I bought there to prove it, though, so Husband is just taking my word on that! Also, we celebrated my birthday and the birthdays of both of my sisters, and we found out that my half-brother will be performing a foreign exchange program wherein he leaves his home country and comes to live with my parents for the spring semester of this year. That should be alot of fun and I am looking forward to seeing him again.

This blog has always been a place for me to talk about my life today, right here and right now, so that I do not forget alot of what happens. I figure these are some of the most important times of my life as they are setting up my future, and I never want to forget them. It has taken me completely by surprise, however, to find that I rarely have the time to update. I will definitely start to focus on that more!

Details Details

We are down to the final pre-wedding days. Last Saturday, my half-sister flew in from Switzerland and that's when everything really kicked off. Ever since, Fiance and I have been focused on last minute prep. On Saturday morning, we ran some errands and I had my dress picked up and my hair dry run done before picking up Half-Sister from the airport and afterwards we all had dinner at my parents' place. Earlier in the day, my family had picked up a cheesecake for Half-Sister because it is one of her favorite foods and cheesecake doesn't exist in Switzerland. On Sunday, we had a waffle breakfast with my family. Afterwards, Fiance jammed on the guitar with my dad for awhile and then went home to work on finalizing the reception playlist. Meanwhile, Mom and Sister and Half-Sister and I went shopping for shoes to go with Half-Sister's bridesmaid dress. That evening, we all met up again with Fiance at my cousin's house for a graduation party. Cousin graduated with her Bachelor degree earlier in the summer but then spent a month traveling around Australia so this was really the first chance they had for a party. Immediately following the party, Fiance and I drove to visit his sister to drop off the flower girl dress for her oldest daughter. It fit perfectly! =)

On Monday, I ran errands in the morning and then went to the Laguna Beach Sawdust Art Festival with Mom and Half-Sister. It was alot of fun and I think we all enjoyed looking around at all the art. We had lunch down the street at a second art festival and after wandering around that, we met Dad and Fiance back at my parents' house before driving over to the reception location for a final chat about how everything would play out. Once that was finished, Fiance and I drove around looking at local houses for sale a little bit and we all had steaks for dinner. Yesterday, Fiance and I both worked in the morning. I went to a movie later with Cousin's kids and Sister and Half-Sister and then Fiance and I met up and went to the photographer's for one last hoorah. Oh, and we also picked up our wedding bands.

And that takes us to today. So far, we have to stop by waste management to recycle an old computer monitor and to stop by Fiance's Brother's house to drop off his daughter's flower girl dress. We also need to buy a couple frames, tidy the apartment before Fiance's friend drives in Friday night, and drop off a few sweaters of mine at the dry cleaners'. Tomorrow, my uncles and my grandparents arrive from out of state. It's going to just get busier from here until the wedding this weekend!! =)

The Action-Packed Week

I wish I had time to update this properly because I don't want to forget this time in my life, but it seems like every spare second is devoted to...something. Anything. Everything under the sun that is not blogging.

Fiance and I spent Independence Day with his brother's family. Fiance's brother lives on a lake so we drove out in the morning and left just before the fireworks. Last year, we stayed for the fireworks but this year we were both tired and I needed to be up early for work the next morning so we missed them. Next year, I'll make sure that I'm not working the 5th of July!

We also celebrated my mother's birthday last week - and just as I wrote this sentence I realized that today is Fiance's mother's birthday and DAMN IT can you believe that I forgot to mail her birthday card?! - which was nice. We all had dinner together and then we had cake and she opened her gifts. It was nothing spectacular, but it was special =)

Last Friday, I spent the day hanging out with Fiance's sister-in-law. The plan had been to help her out with some house-chores and to scrapbook with Niece. But when I got there it was so hot that her candles were melting inside the house so we ended up sitting around talking and playing with the baby. And taking pictures. And having lunch out. And things like that.

Saturday was a busy day. In the morning I had a dress tailoring. I went straight from that to my bridal shower which was alot of fun and filled with everything from lingerie to dishes to cookbooks. I wish I had more pictures but I'm sure that once I beg everyone in my life for theirs that it will turn out alright. After the bridal shower, I drove to my parents' house where Fiance and Dad had been hanging out together (outside of their excursion to see a movie and drink beer) to drop off some dress accessories and pick up Fiance.

Yesterday was busy too. I picked up the rest of the bridal shower gifts from the shower hostess after Fiance and I went out to breakfast. Then we checked out announcement papers, thank you notecards for the shower and the bachelorette party, and the wine-and-cheese party, and the wedding, along with flower girl dresses and shoes and headbands and the like. Yes, run-on sentences are my friends when I'm busy.

Oh and last week was also our engagement portrait sitting session which meant that a couple of days later we received the proofs in the mail. Today I spent my lunch break calling various vendors - including the photographer - to schedule about five million appointments for Thursday when I'll be done working early - probably around 2pm or so. YAY!

That's all. That's it. That's the end.

This wedding hasn't been very stressful. Some people keep saying that I seem stressed but I keep thinking about some other very stressful times in my life - like attack after attack with my Crohn's last summer - and I've decided that many people in my life just assume that I'm stressed when I'm not. Last summer, I was stressed. I thought there was something seriously wrong and there were nights when I would lay down and wish I would die so the pain would end and then I would wake up an hour later spasming and puking and wondering if I weren't well on my way to dying. Last summer there were days when I was positive it might be my last, and there were moments when I honestly thought that if one more person breathed within five miles of me that I would have to take a hatchet to them. I was stressed and jumpy and anxious. And people in my life then never said I seemed stressed, when I was going through what was easily the most stressful period of my life yet. But this wedding? A piece of cake. So I just don't understand why people now are saying I seem stressed. Maybe they just expect it so they think they see signs of stress? The only day that has been even remotely stressful was Saturday and that wasn't stressful because of anything particular, I just felt guilty about being late.

Oh, and a car ran a light at about 50mph in a 35mph zone and literally missed me by inches, let's not forget that part of Saturday morning. That scared the shit out of me.

But anyway, that's it. I've got more busy-ness ahead, so I'll write later. Much later. In fact, I may not properly update this thing until after the wedding when I have more time. Which reminds me, I should clarify that half of my busy-ness has nothing to do with hanging out with family or with making wedding plans. Nope. I'm reading through a series of books so that I can return them to the woman who lent them to me and they are Time-Consuming. Trust me.

A List in Paragraph Form

As the wedding draws closer, I am ever thankful that Fiance and I made the decision early on to keep everything as simple as possible. Nothing about this planning process has been difficult or time consuming, and almost all facets of the wedding have fallen into place with little effort and no explanation. It has been wonderful.

We have, however, been busy. A few weekends ago, Fiance's mother told him that his aunt's birthday was coming up. I like Fiance's aunt so I bought a birthday card, sent it, and then asked Fiance if we could do something to celebrate with her. Fiance agreed and called his sister and made arrangements. Last Sunday, Fiance and I followed his sister and her kids up to Fiance's aunt's place. We hung out, went to lunch, hung out some more, and then drove home. It was a nice day and I hope that Fiance's aunt had a happy birthday.

Then, Fiance and I spent most of this last weekend at my parents. On Saturday, we helped garden for the first half of the day and then we left just shy of dinner time after walking around the neighborhood and hanging out with Mom and Sister. Yesterday morning, Mom called to let me know that Neighbor Family had an emergency so she wouldn't need us to garden because she'd be watching the kids. We drove over to the house anyway and spent the morning running down the street with the kids and then playing hide and seek. It was incredibly hot and I was very tired afterward but I got a couple good photographs out of it =) Yesterday afternoon, some of our plans fell through so we saw "Ocean's 13" instead. Halfway through the film, the lights came on in the theater and a loudspeaker announced that an emergency had been reported. We all filed out the exits at the bottom and then walked around the outside and, when it turned out to be a false alarm, we were re-admitted to find that they started the film again - without us in the theater. It was interesting, to say the least.

Today we have a wedding-related appointment at 3pm not too far from home. On the way home, we are buying birthday cards and gifts for my mother and his mother since their birthdays are Thursday and next Monday, respectively. And this evening, I am sorting out photographs for the family (and hopefully this time I will not crash Fiance's hard disk...) and Fiance has some work to do. Tomorrow, Sister flies home from her nannying gig in Spain. We are spending Independence Day with Fiance's brother, who lives on a lake, and then hoping to celebrate Mom's birthday with her Thursday night. This weekend is my dress fitting and the wedding shower. The weekend after that is my bachelorette party, Fiance's bachelor party, and a lingerie shower. The weekend after that Half-Sister flies into town from Switzerland and tries on her bridesmaid dress for the first time - hopefully it fits!! And the weekend after that, Fiance and I get hitched =)

Nothing too exciting, but that is where my life stands right now.

I Love Backrubs and He Knows It

- My back hurts.

Fiance turns around and looks at me.

- Right here, on the lefthand side.

Fiance raises his eyebrows.

- Why are you looking at me like I'm totally milking this?
- No I'm not.
- Yes you are.
- No. I'm looking at you like it's quite unfortunate that your back hurts, but I think it's all a ploy.

Why You May One Day See Me at a Remote-Controlled Helicopter Conference

I forced Fiance to go to the LA Bloggers Party with me. The man had absolutely no say in the matter.

On Saturday, Fiance and I were running late from about 8am on. We had a million errands to run - including borrowing a bundt cake pan from my parents - and it took us much longer than we had anticipated. After we were finally home, Fiance set to work making a lasagna and I ran a couple more errands we had forgotten about. I'm not typically much help with lasagna making because Fiance doesn't follow a recipe, he just smells and tastes and works from memory. All I do is grate the cheese and after a few pounds of cheese have been grated, he tends to intervene because I do that so damned slow it is maddening.

For at least a month, Fiance and I had been planning to attend the LA Bloggers Party. I had responded to the email invitation that we would bring lasagna and Kahlua cake and that we would show up early to help get things set up. So I knew that we needed to leave at, oh, 4pm Saturday afternoon.

4pm came. And 4pm went. SHIT.
And then 5pm came. And 5pm went.
And then 6pm came. And we finally left.

Fiance, the poor and wonderful soul that he is, tried to stay out of my way while I panicked and fumed for two hours that THEY WERE ALL GOING TO HATE ME because I said we'd be there by NOW and we hadn't even left and WHEN THE HELL would that cake be finished baking and WHY wouldn't the FUCKING lasagna brown already?

I think he was maybe two minutes away from taking me out back, shooting me, and then claiming my whereabouts were a mystery.

I kid. He would never hurt a hair on my body unless it was by accident or he got a good laugh out of it.

Anyway, the party was great. And they didn't hate me after all. And here is the photographic evidence:

(RedStapler, Fiance, and LA Daddy)

A non-blogger, Tara Met Blog, her friend, and 8 Centimeters Deluded

Frowning of a Lifetime, Childsplayx2, Honea Express, Sink into the Pacific, Tara Met Blog, and House of Prince (left to right, top then bottom)

Fiance taking a shot with Tara Met Blog and two other peoples' hands =)

Now I have some people to email and soon I'll add a sidebar link page with everyone's websites. I'll also get all the links in order for this post, which shouldn't take too long. I used everyone's screennames and blurred out the nametags because I'm not sure who is picky about being anonymous and who is not. Hopefully all the pictures that I need to email and responses to comments and emails that I have received will be finished soon. I'm sorry to those of you who have been inconvenienced by my inability to email in a timely fashion but in my defense, I'm, er, busy? =P Thanks for your patience!

When Good Things End

I learned yesterday that a girl I went to high school with was murdered recently. Murdered. Along with her father and her mother, she was beaten and then stabbed and then torched. Her mother survived - although her medical state is critical - but her father perished with her. Their home was destroyed in a fire.

When I say that I went to high school with her, I need to clarify that I did not know her. We were not friends or even acquaintances and her name didn't sound familiar. My sister had to pull out the yearbook and show me photographs. She was a few years younger than me, which may be part of it.

In the grand scheme of things, high school is a very short period in one's life. Every year or so, I run into so-and-so at the supermarket or in line at an amusement park or out to dinner and we'll stand there for five or ten minutes and catch up. This is how I have found out about weddings, divorces, babies, graduations, deaths, and all sorts of other occurences. But I also run into so-and-so from other facets of my life: former coworkers, fellow volunteers, ex-clients, people my parents or sisters know, etc. And from these people, I also hear about a multitude of happenings. High school figures - students, teachers, coaches, and administration alike - are a very small percentage of the total number of people I encounter like this, but they comprise a total after all and that's something.

As high school is a definite period in my life, something I can measure as having been a constant in my life over the span of four years, it is easy to use that one as a measuring stick of sorts. And since those years, it never ceases to amaze me what I hear along the road. Last year, I ran into a former teacher who had married a fellow student. About six months ago, I saw a high school friend who told me about the suicide of someone I hadn't seen since graduation. Things like that, they always hit close to home because they make me reconsider my life.

This murder, this heinous act committed against a family who CERTAINLY DID NOT DESERVE IT, struck me last night. I researched it in the news this morning and I have spent the entire day turning it over in my head. What was she like, this woman? Who was she and would things have been different if we had ever met? Did I ever brush up against her in the hallway, did I know her and have since forgotten, what could she have taught me in life? What was her family like? Who were they and why would someone do this to them? What could possibly possess someone to do something like this to another human, to an entire family, to a full community?

I guess you could say that I have always been a fairly idealistic individual. I like to think that people are inherently good and I prefer to consider their mistakes while believing that they did the best they could, the best they knew how to do. The more I hear about incidents like this - the incidents that hit me the hardest because I have something in common with that victim - the more I loose a little of that shimmer from my youth. I know that it is only natural, that with time all peoples' optimism fades a little. I'm still a silver lining kind of gal and I am more grateful today than I was yesterday. It's just difficult to learn of an event such as this one and not realize that innocence is something which is stripped of someone, layer by layer, in this world.

And that's a shame. It really is.
Rest in peace. I am praying for your family.